Legacy Volume 5
Legacy Volume 5
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Want to read some of the zine before you decide whether to buy it? Sort of like picking up a book in the bookstore and flipping through the pages, it's a good way to discover if this zine is the right one for you. Just click on the links below to be transported into the special K/S world created by that particular author….
CAUGHT IN THE WEB by Deanna Gray
IN THE AFTER SILENCE by Isabol
PENALTIES AND REWARDS by A.T. Bush
SAYING GOOD-BYE by Carolyn Spencer
ARTICLES (A SAMPLE)
ZINES: NOW AND FOREVER: 1996-2005 by Carolyn Spencer
ART: EDITORS TALK BACK by Liz
LETTERZINES: TREKLINK by Dorothy Laoang
THE INTERNET: K/S AND INTERNET CONNECTIONS by Lyrastar
From Caught in the Web by Deanna Gray
The door to his quarters closed behind him with the customary noise that was always loud to his acute hearing. His human shipmates did not find it unnecessarily noisy as he did, he knew.
Spock removed his tunic, followed by his thermal shirt. As accustomed to the Enterprise’s climate as he was after so many years, it still felt good to return to the warmth of his cabin after hours in the cooler environment. Methodically he continued to strip until naked, his sexual organ still partially erect, the now-typical result of an evening spent with his captain.
It was illogical to deny his yearning for the human, especially at times like these when it was physically obvious. Desire was only part of the equation, however. More disturbing and much harder to assimilate into his life was the emotional attachment that had developed within him. And there was evidence it was growing. A smile generated a current of warmth through him. A laugh resulted in welling joy. A light touch upon his arm, eagerly accepted, caused tiny explosions along his nerves.
Resolutely he gathered his discarded uniform and placed it in the recycler. Taking a robe from his closet, he slipped it on and took several steps toward his bed. His penis was still firm. He looked down at his organ, studying it for a moment before grasping the shaft. Slowly he slid his hand up, then down. Again. And a third time. It was delightful to feel the skin moving over his inner hardness. He ran his thumb over the head several times before sliding it between the twin ridges, increasing the pleasure. Dropping his controls completely, he pumped his member steadily, allowing the physical sensations to flow through him.
Ah, it felt so good to experience such pure physical enjoyment, something he denied himself. But his mind refused to leave it at that, and the insidious thought unfurled, of how much better it would be if it were a cool, human hand upon his sex. Not just any human, however. Only one in particular would suffice.
An image of his captain materialized in his mind’s eye: such a handsome face, with fascinating eyes. Smooth skin covering a muscular body that the human shamelessly paraded before his first officer’s eyes in all innocence, in the gym showers, their shared bathroom. Feet planted firmly on the floor, head tilted back with his eyes closed, the sweet tension quickly mounting in his loins. His hand moved faster. Courageous, impetuous, emotional, quick-silver intelligence, clear laughter, an errant lock of hair that would not stay put, that smile….
It was madness now. Currents of pleasure surging through his body, the almost-overwhelming tension building, hips thrusting his achingly-hard member through firmly gripping fingers, all while his mind focused on its vision of Kirk. To do this, to mate just once with Jim…his testicles clenched and he knew he was about to orgasm. It would feel so very good to allow the floodgates to open and let his body completely yield to its desire, especially with Jim….
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From In the
After Silence by Isabol
Captain Kirk stubbornly remained on the bridge for several hours of what he termed “fence-mending” after regaining control of his ship from Janice Lester. He managed to take up the reins of command, starting the process of soothing hurt feelings with subtle humor and a professional manner. Despite Kirk’s gentle confidence with the crew, there were moments when Spock observed bewilderment behind the captain’s facade. Privately admitting to his own worry, the first officer now accompanied Kirk as he retreated into his office with a hovering CMO close on their heels.
McCoy had his scanner running before Kirk slid wearily into the chair at his desk. “Jim, I think you should come with me to sickbay. I should run more—”
“Bones, no, just…” Kirk ran a hand over his face. Then, he finished quietly, “I don’t want to be in sickbay…with her.”
“Jim, I—” Still focused on his scanner, McCoy stopped when the captain’s fingers closed over the device in his hand.
“I’m all right. Feel a little like I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster. Just…give me some time to regroup.”
The flat tone was a certain indication of the captain’s level of fatigue. Spock stepped forward, placing himself between the captain and McCoy in an effort to prevent an argument.
The doctor glanced at him speculatively and then nodded. “All right, Jim. I want to see you first thing in the morning. I think it would be a good idea for you to plan to take the day off.”
“Doctor, right now is not—” Kirk stopped, frowning. “We’ll talk about it in the morning.”
Grumbling, McCoy left but not before piercing Spock with a pointed glance when his back was turned to Kirk. It was the doctor’s less than subtle method of ordering Spock to remain with the captain.
Relieved when the captain did not ask him to leave, Spock sat across from him, silently supportive. The captain fumbled with items on his desk, as if his fingers were suddenly clumsy. With an aggravated motion, he shoved the stylus aside and folded his hands tightly. “Your assessment of the crew’s confidence in the command structure?”
Watching the flash of vulnerability beneath the tight expression, Spock fought the urge to go to his side. In Lester’s body, Kirk had seemed to benefit from his physical presence, reaching out to him, never straying from his side.
Instead, Spock forced himself to answer truthfully despite the cost to the man across from him. “Below the fifty percent range as of 0400 today. I will reassess in the morning. I believe your interactions on the bridge this evening will bring the statistics significantly to within acceptable Starfleet norms.”
“That’s not good enough.” Kirk frowned. He retrieved the stylus only to have it jump out of his hand and fall to the floor. “Damn. Everything feels off…” he whispered, leaning over to pick it up. “Spock, despite McCoy’s concerns, I believe it is vital that you and I make rounds first thing, show everyone that I haven’t gone off the deep end.”
Brief gratitude flickered over Kirk’s face. “Good.” He drew a breath, running a hand over his face again and stopped to stare at it as if transfixed. Grimacing, he sighed and dropped his hand to the desk. Shaking his head slightly, Kirk’s voice was thin and grating with fatigue. “I haven’t thanked you for helping me. The mind meld wasn’t easy for you. I…”
“Jim, I suffered no ill effects from the meld between us. If the circumstances had been different, I believe the sharing would have been enjoyable.” He paused, not certain of Kirk’s response to his words. Remembering the transcendent joy that had briefly passed between them in the meld, Spock chanced adding, “And I believe I would appreciate the opportunity to meld with you again.”
Hope flared in the expressive eyes and then Kirk stiffened, a shudder shaking his frame. He closed his eyes tightly, fingers gripping his desk. Unable to withstand the tension without attempting to do something to alleviate the captain’s distress, Spock traversed the short distance between them. The shoulders tightened at Spock’s touch and he simply rested his hands, waiting for Kirk to accept his tentative offer of support. Finally one hand crept up to cover Spock’s, a fine trembling in the fingers.
Beginning a gentle massage, the Vulcan kept the touch light. After several minutes, he was relieved when Kirk slumped forward, his hands coming up to cover his face. But Kirk’s weary tension didn’t ease; his shoulders tightened again.
Kirk came out of his chair suddenly, reaching up to grasp Spock’s shoulders painfully. Tortured eyes searched his before Kirk turned his face away. “The only reality,” Kirk gasped out, “in that pit of insanity was you. I know you saw how desperate I was when you touched my thoughts. If you hadn’t—”
“I am here, Jim. I would not have deserted you.”
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From Penalties and Rewards by A.T. Bush
“…come back and talk to me….” Jim had said.
Spock sighed, nagged by the not-altogether casual comment/order. He nodded to the transporter officers, giving permission to deactivate the equipment and log the safe transportation of Fleet Captain Pike to Talos IV. Their final farewell had been necessarily brief and one-sided. Still, Chris Pike had signaled one long “yes” and Spock had acknowledged the intended and sincere “thank you.”
He suspected that now much of Pike’s hopelessness and depression had been lifted, he would not be whiling away all of his time living in fantasies. It simply wasn’t in his nature. No doubt, Pike would soon be urging the Talosians to venture to the surface and to begin reclaiming their own planet, as well as making plans for future generations. The horribly crippled Starfleet officer, and his inspirational spirit, might very well be the savior of the Talosian race after all. Spock sincerely wished him good fortune and happiness.
His duty to his former captain and friend had now been discharged, the outcome certainly better than he could ever have expected. Now to face his current commander, somehow to placate, to regain Jim’s….
“Mr. Spock to the bridge.” He heard from the intercom, very grateful for the timely postponement of that difficult talk.
“…and besides, when do you find time to monitor ‘subspace chatter’…that is, the gossip?” Kirk recalled Mendez’s casual comment. He sipped his rye whiskey-flavored water and leaned back in his desk chair, tempted to put his feet up. The chess game, which he had won, was over and they were winding down from another long day of duty.
Four busy days had passed since they had left Talos IV on course for Ceremi VII. Conducting the sham court martial had wasted too many hours and both had fallen behind with ship’s paperwork. This was the first opportunity for conversation and Kirk had chosen to bring up the delayed—but not forgotten—subject.
“Occasionally, when I am working, reading, compiling reports, it is there in background.”
Kirk squinted at his relaxed Vulcan. Good to see. Spock had been incredibly tense, visibly on edge all during the incident. “Of course. I had forgotten that you can concentrate on three things simultaneously. Must be wonderful to have a superior Vulcan brain.”
It was Spock’s turn to squint. The comment had not sounded like a compliment. Instead…. “I am curious about all things.” Just in case Kirk was not being facetious.
“You might consider sharing some of the news you glean from the idle gossip. I didn’t appreciate being kept out of the loop about Chris.” Kirk had spent only a few days with the former captain during change of command of the Enterprise. Mostly transitional briefings. But he had liked Pike as a man.
Spock gnawed his lip. Before discovering the seriousness of Pike’s injuries, he had intended to relate the awful news of the accident. Later, he realized there was a possible solution to his former captain’s hopeless situation. If he dared risk secretly transmitting a long-range message to Talos to solicit their assistance…dared to risk death. Alone. “Actually, Jim, I was terrified…apprehensive that you would somehow hear of his tragic condition before I could implement my rescue plan and that you would realize that I had…had lied to you. Also…it was imperative that you be capable of truthfully denying any involvement.”
Kirk smiled wanly. How could he berate Spock for loving him enough to protect him from his own rash impulsiveness, for he would have insisted on helping Spock in any scheme with a chance to succeed. “Okay. You wanted to protect me. Just don’t ever do that again. Got that, Mister? We stand together or fall together. Right? No lies. No secrets.” Kirk intended to let it all drop now. During the disturbing ordeal, he had felt betrayed, aggrieved and jealous…and insecure and fuming angry. Not one positive emotion.
Spock arched an eyebrow, sensing Kirk had now come to terms with the incident. “Secrets, Captain? I dare say every man has a few secrets. Did Doctor McCoy not hint that you had made a secret conquest which, I believe, was the commodore’s very attractive aide.”
Now Kirk did lean back and laugh. “Bones has a big mouth. I persuaded Ms. Piper to intercede with Mendez on your behalf. Remember those two men you assaulted in Base Communications? All charges were dropped. Case closed.”
“Indeed? My deepest appreciation, sir.” Spock indicated the board. “Shall we have another game?”
“You just want to get even.” Kirk began the set-up.
“I believe that I have won considerably more games in the past few….”
Kirk smiled, relaxing fully as they engaged in familiar mock bickering. Spock made him feel secure, happy, at peace—all the good emotions. And he loved Spock just as much.
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From Saying Good-bye by Carolyn Spencer
“Recording chip on.”
According to Bones, I simply have to say this phrase and the implanted memory chip will record not only my words, but my thoughts as well. I hope that’s true. At least that was what it was designed to do in temporal shift assignments. It will be important to have an objective record to check…after this is all over. It’s rather ironic that it was this damn place that provided ‘Fleet INTEL with the impetus to make such a device.
Hope this thing is working. All right. Deep breath and here we go:
This is Admiral James T. Kirk, in command of the starship Enterprise, but I am here as simply Jim Kirk, private citizen of the Federation. I wish it known that no one on my ship or in Starfleet has aided me in this endeavor or has had advance knowledge of it. What I do here, I do on my own. I am solely responsible for my own actions…and perhaps my own damnation.
I am now standing on Tempus Prime or, as it has come to be known to a select few, the planet of the Guardian of Forever. If the Klingons or Romulans ever found out they could change the course of history merely by stepping through this gateway to the past, the Federation and everything we now know would cease to exist. But I’m not thinking of our enemies right now. No, rather my thoughts are with the billions who would choose to use the Guardian for the purpose I would use it, for the purpose I will use it this night. The Federation would deny us this. The loss of my command would be the least of the consequences I would face for my actions. The moral laws, the duty by which I have lived my entire life ceased to exist the moment I brought the shuttle in for a landing on this forbidden world. Duty…. Once this word was price enough. It was enough to condemn Edith to death. Enough to sentence Tyree’s world to war and destruction. Enough to forgo the comfort of home and family. It is no longer enough. Now the sound of the word in my mouth is as arid as bones bleaching white in the desert, and I will not offer Spock up as one more sacrifice on its altar.
I’ve sold my soul, and I have to think that any cost I have to pay will be worth it.
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From Zines: Now and Forever: 1996 to 2005 by Carolyn Spencer
After twenty years of print slash, one would hardly expect K/S to be alive and thriving. There are only so many stories about Kirk and Spock to tell after all, right? Not so. Two decades after slash began, K/S was still picking up steam. Yes, some zine series had faded away leaving a rich legacy behind for those who knew where to look, but others were alive and vibrant and going strong.
Robin Hood, a force in fandom since the early ‘80s, added five more zines in 1996. Beside First Time 44 and 45, she published the next in her series of zines devoted to the universe we saw in the episode “Mirror, Mirror”: Within the Mirror 11. Scattered Stars 8, the series dealing with alternate universes, also was published that year as well as Beside Myself 4, a whole zine written by Robin under various pen names.
Dorothy L. was up to her third issue of Amazing Grace, Emily Adams published KaleidoScope 4 and 5, and Jean H. produced Way of the Warrior 8, the last in her zine series.
Kathy Resch published T’hy’la 17 and the year’s only novel, Worlds Apart. This 206-page work by M.E. Carter is set in an alternate universe. In this time and place Kirk is the son of a rich landowner, and Spock is a peasant on a planet where Vulcans and humans have as little to do with each other as possible. Despised by his own people as well as the humans, Spock and his mother are truly alone until he happens to meet a young and handsome traveler on a deserted road.
Kathy also published Setting Course. Finally all three novellas and four short stories that spanned the time between Jenna Sinclair’s first two novels in her series—Sharing the Sunlight (1992) and Promises to Keep (1995)—were collected in one easy-to-find volume.
As the ‘90s progressed and more and more people acquired personal computers, the internet opened lines of communication never before conceived. Not only did it become easier than ever before to physically tell a story, it became far simpler to share that story with others. Along with the anonymity the internet brought, there also came a lowering of inhibition. And virtually immediate feedback. Send a chapter out on the ether, and by the next day response flowed back.
Of course, here again K/S made its lasting impact. People who had never before been exposed to this remarkable relationship between Kirk and Spock suddenly discovered a whole new universe to play in. In a fandom remarkably devoid of constraints, even those very few canonical aspects can be ignored by the uninitiated. Freedom has always been the name of the game.
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Editors Talk Back by Liz
What made you decide to print artwork given that it is expensive and difficult to reproduce?
Dovya writes “I wanted art and lots of it. I wanted a Gayle F. cover for my first issue of As I Do Thee. I didn’t think I’d get one but that’s what I wanted. I wanted to dive right into the thick of K/S and go for what I thought was the best for my cover. To my utter surprise, Gayle was more than happy to do a cover for me, she even ‘edited’ part of the drawing that was a bit too risqué for my cover tastes. We worked together on many projects through the years, even non-fan projects. In general I’d send the story or poem to a particular artist and they interpreted the fiction or poetry in the most wonderful ways. It added such a rich texture to the zines.” Dovya explains that nowadays, “art is not expensive or difficult to reproduce if you have the right printer (which is a good thing—and a hard thing—to find). In the old days, half-tones—pencil work—were quite a bit more expensive than ink work but not so much so that I shied away from printing it. I always preferred to accept pen and ink as it is simpler to reproduce but I never hesitated to publish pencil work. Now, if you’re talking color work, before the excellent color photo-copy machines we have now, yes, I did hesitate to publish color art. In fact, until recently—because of the color photo-copiers and how good they are—I never published color work.”
Robin’s reply is typically succinct and to the point, “Every editor before me had art, I loved it, therefore….” Ergo her zines are lavishly illoed from cover to cover. In fact the very first thing I do when I get a Merry Men Press zine in the post is flick through for the artwork.
Kathy also enjoys the visual elements of the zines she produces. She writes, “I studied Commercial Art (now called Graphic Design) in college, and so I was always focused on producing the most attractively laid-out zines I could achieve, given the constraints of materials and technology.” This certainly shows in the zines whose visual pleasures go far beyond the nice artwork. T’hy’la is immaculately laid out and the title pages of the stories often include neat graphics.
Linda has strong memories of seeing K/S art early on, in fact it was the cover of a zine that converted her! Her meeting with K/S art went something like this: “‘Ohmigod, what the bleep.’ Slam zine down and walk away, come back, look again ‘maybe.’ It was a Naked Times at Worldcon ‘93. I don’t know who the artist was. That was a shocking introduction, and I’ve been converted to the dark side ever since.” So it was no real surprise that Linda never considered having a text only zine. She writes, “I love artwork of various media for K/S. Good artwork should be reproduced to best advantage, showing all the tonal gradations…er…keeping expense in mind of course. It’s not that expensive anymore to print artwork because of scanners, personal printers and color copiers so you can reproduce art fairly inexpensively, not cheaply, but fairly inexpensively. But when I decided to publish a zine my major thought was ‘I hope I get some art. I don’t have time to draw any to supplement the zine.’”
Jenna is a connoisseur of art, and she too remembers early artistic encounters which just bowled her over. She explains, “I was intensely grateful to the artists who were giving me a look at what had only been going on inside my head before then. I mean, actually seeing Kirk and Spock together in a K/S type of pose, and not just having to rely on my imagination for the images…. I cannot convey how excited I was. When D’Anne and I decided to publish a zine, there was never any question in my mind that we would publish the most explicit art, and that I was going to actively seek that out. Other than that, we just wanted plenty of art in our zines, as I consider artwork an integral part of the K/S world. I wanted prose, poetry, and art, all together, of the highest calibre.” I for one think she got some, there are some top class examples of K/S in Jenna’s zines.
Berit in Germany writes that “reproduction is not such a problem here. At first we don’t sell that much zines as the US publishers, I think. Second, one of my co-editors has the chance to make colour copies at her work from time to time so even that’s not that expensive. She copies the art for us. The black and white we do in a copy-shop.”
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From Letterzines: Treklink by Dorothy Laoang
The editor of Treklink was Joan Marie Verba; it was published from 1985 to 1989. The stated purpose of the letterzine was for the discussion of fan writing, providing authors with comments on their stories. It came in two sections. Section 1 was for gen fanzines not requiring an age statement. Section 2 was for adult fanzines, including heterosexual and K/S. In order to get section 2, one had to request it with an age statement. Most subscribers took both.
Some subscribers who had only read gen zines had never read K/S or had negative opinions of it, but in some cases were open enough to read it and comment on it.
Treklink did not have any zine ads, but a nice feature it did have was a listing of all the zines mentioned in each issue, with the prices and ordering information.
TREKLINK #6—October, 1986
Bonita K. wrote:
“Having read about K/S, but not having read any, I went to the Anaheim Creation Con and succumbed to As I Do Thee 2. Annoyingly, it turned out to be the best written and illustrated zine I’d come across. Very sexy, though; to my mind, it’s best read with a husband or other lover handy. You’ll need one! ‘The Land of Tears’ by Debbie P. is a great story of emotional healing. Dovya Blacque’s ‘From the Fields’ is a touching love story, with some of the best lines in the zine. (“‘I mean, what am I supposed to say? “Hi, Spock. What’s up? Still in love with me?’”) I also enjoyed ‘The Rumor’ by Natasha Solten. The illustrations are magnificent, though I confess a preference for…fully clothed heroes over naked-and-going-at-it drawings. But that’s a matter of taste, not of judgment.”
TREKLINK #7—January, 1987
Randall A. L. wrote:
“I for one, would like to see more on non-K/S adult zines. Having done only one such (non-K/S adult) zine, I am considering a second. During the time I spent working on the zine, we received only a few non-K/S stories and several K/S submissions. We opted to return all the K/S ones, as I do not accept the concept as plausible.
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From The Internet: K/S and Internet Connections by Lyrastar
The 21st century has been called the Communication Age. As Internet technology burgeoned around the developed world, people with niche interests like K/S have been able to connect almost instantly across the miles. It shouldn’t surprise those who know her that where there’s a possibility of networking with slashers, Kathy Resch has been near the heart.
Says Kathy: “I first went online about May of 1995. A friend told me about the Star Trek message boards on AOL, one of which was ‘Are Kirk and Spock Lovers?’ I went there right away. None of the posts were from anyone who seemed to have any knowledge of K/S fandom. Several people said, yes, they liked the idea. There were, of course, trolls (K/S objectors being intentionally disruptive) going on about how nasty and disgusting we all were.
“I posted a short message to the list. As I recall, I said, ‘Of course they are. E-mail me, and I'll tell you more.’ Several people did. I told them about fanzines, the history of K/S fandom, and that there were lots of people who loved this idea so much that entire novels had been written about the premise.
“Conversation on this list petered out pretty quickly; a lot of that was due to all the trolls. Also, AOL kept changing the interface of the boards. The look of and access to the interest areas kept changing.”
Killa tells about making a connection from the other side: “Around the middle of 1995, I found a thread on the AOL Star Trek message boards that said, ‘Are Kirk and Spock Lovers?’ I clicked on it, and the first message there was posted by Kathy Resch. It said, ‘Of course they are! E-mail me for details.’
“I did, and she introduced me to zines, particularly T’hy’la and First Time. This message board was never terribly active, though. John Ordover was posting to those boards, and I think we all felt that we were ‘under the eye’ of The Powers That Be, so posts were infrequent.”
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